Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
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