She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
