P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
