what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
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