Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize