You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
