I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize