Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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