3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Your cock deserves a montage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
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