That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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