he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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