I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
