For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Randomize
