the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
