Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I will be naked everywhere
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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