I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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