Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
they're like a gay fantastic four
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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