I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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