How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
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