I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
