Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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