"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
