I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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