I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
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