Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize