Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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