If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
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i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
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When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
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