Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking