was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
