Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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