He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize