I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
