Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Randomize
