I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
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