Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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