So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.