its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
