Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
