she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
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i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
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Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
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