there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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