My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
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