:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Randomize
