okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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