ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
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