You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
that may or may not have been my penis.
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