I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize