well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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