playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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