I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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