Will you blow on my dice?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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